Richard Osman Quotes

• “In life you have to learn to count the good days. You have to tuck them in your pocket and carry them around with you. So I’m putting today in my pocket and I’m off to bed.”

  Richard Osman

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• “After a certain age, you can pretty much do whatever takes your fancy. No one tells you off, except for your doctors and your children.”

  Richard Osman

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• “I'm afraid I don't know WTF. I only discovered LOL from Joyce last week”

  Richard Osman

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• “Many years ago, everybody here would wake early because there was much to do and only so many hours in the day. Now they wake early because there is much to do and only so many days left.”

  Richard Osman

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• “You can have too much choice in this world. And when everyone has too much choice, it is also much harder to get chosen. And we all want to be chosen.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Was he a content man, doing the things he liked alone? Or was he a lonely man making the best out of what he had? Alone, or lonely?”

  Richard Osman

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• “It was a well-known fact that there were no calories in homemade cakes.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Some people love their children more than they love their partner,’ says Ibrahim, ‘and some people love their partner more than their children. And no one can ever admit to either thing.”

  Richard Osman

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• “It’s great to be the fastest runner, but not when you’re running in the wrong direction.”

  Richard Osman

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• “If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Who killed Tony Curran though? Ventham. Typical Blairite.”

  Richard Osman

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• “He’s all the things that can go wrong with men if you leave them to their own devices.”

  Richard Osman

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• “The only remaining illumination comes from behind the thick hospital blinds of Willows. The business of dying keeping different hours from the business of living.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Ian Ventham’s death was caused by fentanyl poisoning. A massive overdose, delivered into the muscle of his upper arm.”

  Richard Osman

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• “The sun is up, the skies are blue and murder is in the air.”

  Richard Osman

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• “The police had the money and the uncle within the hour and Bernie never got his PlayStation.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Bit by bit, Donna was intent on dragging Chris from his century into hers.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Of all the things to lose, to lose one’s mind?”

  Richard Osman

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• “because you know that getting out of a garden chair at our age is a military operation. Once you are in one, you can be in it for the day.”

  Richard Osman

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• “If this is a bluff, it’s a high-risk one. Because we will catch this murderer. Even if it’s you.”

  Richard Osman

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• “People without a sense of humor will never forgive you for being funny.”

  Richard Osman

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• “Tony is not a believer in luck; he’s a believer in hard work. If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail.”

  Richard Osman

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• “There is another dating app for gay men called Grindr. Perhaps it’s for gay women too? I don’t know, I didn’t ask. Would they use the same one? That would be nice.”

  Richard Osman

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• “I have something to show you. Is best to wait till dark.”

  Richard Osman

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• “People without a sense of humor will never forgive you for being funny. But”

  Richard Osman

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